My Bad Job

Tap, tap, went my pencil. I was practicing for my math test.

“Time’s up!” said the teacher.

Oh, no! I hadn’t had anything written down on my paper! I quickly ran up to my teacher.

“I’m afraid you will get an F,” she said.

I rushed home after school.

“How was your day at school?” my mom asked. I didn’t answer.

When I went to school the next day, our teacher made an announcement: “I want you to choose a slip out of this hat, and that will be the job you’ll visit.”

When it was my turn, l wanted to choose one that was really good.

“Oh, for heaven sakes, Mary! Just choose one!” My teacher cried.

“Aw, man! I have to get another check-up!” said Alex holding a tag that said HOSPITAL.

“You’re going there to see how they make all that blucky-ucky medicine,” said Katie.

When I got mine, I made sure nobody saw.

“Okay, everybody on the bus!” shouted my teacher.

“Now who has ’newspaper‘ written on theirs?” I raised my hand. Everyone started saying “That’s not a good place to go!” I just ignored them and walked out the door. We drove to the newspaper company. When I opened the door, a bunch of football guys ran and picked me up.

“Helen! Helen!” they cried. “I’m not Helen!!!!!!” I screamed. I walked past them and went to a lady.

“Can I help you?” she asked.

“Yes. Can you show me around?” I said.

“Of course I can!” she said.

First she showed me the workroom. I looked at the empty computer. While she was talking to a worker, I started typing.

After I left, I heard a man shouting: “Who wrote, ‘I’m the coolest girly in the world’ on my computer?!!”

“Oops,” I said.

After that, she took me to the print room. A man ran up to the lady.

“John’s mother said that John is sick, and he is going to be sick for nine more days, and…,” he began.

“Okay, okay, okay!” said the lady.

She turned to me. “Will you help me by taking over John’s job?” Then she told me all how to be a photographer. I got right to work the next day. I was playing dolls with my friend, and she reached down to get a doll, and ripped her pants. I took a picture of that.

After I took a picture of that, I took it to the newspaper company. They printed it in the newspaper. I handed them out to the school. Everybody but my friend laughed.

I said, “Everybody needs a little laugh around here!”

The same thing happened the next day. Except it happened with my teacher. Well, this is what happened. My teacher was doing math problems. She reached down to pick the chalk up and her underwear showed. I took a picture of that. My teacher heard the "click," and so she got up and bunked her head on the coat rack. (OUCH!!)

Soon I was taking pictures of everybody! And the more I did that, the more they didn't want to read the newspaper. At lunchtime, my friends didn’t eat with me. And at recess I asked them to play, but they didn't answer. Instead, they made mad faces.

I got out my camera and took a picture of them. Well, actually, I held the camera the wrong way, and took a goofy picture of myself. And I accidentally took it to the newspaper company; they printed it and gave it to the school!!!!

"Well, that’s what you get," said my friend.

The next day, I went to the newspaper company. I was just about to tell the lady that I didn’t want to have my job, when she said that John was better!

I went to school the next day, and everyone was expecting to see a camera, but they just saw plain old me. I told them how l wanted to quit my job.

After that, they said, “Do you promise never to do it again?"

“I promise,” I said as I hugged them.